Note: Ok so i just went through this, and it is quite long just stuff i needed to get out so quit while you're ahead. You aren't missing anything except my rambling lol


I've been having a hard time keeping up while living in Korea...it's almost all work and no play, but i've got some time now, so hopefully i'll remember to post some pix and things up that i've accumulated. I've been kinda shy to display my work, because I know I ain't the greatest, and being intimidated by all the awesomeness i am surrounded by...but I realize this site is all about expression, so if I can't put it here where can I? You don't have to be the best artist in the world to be here, just have the desire to create, which honestly, my college career had kind of...killed for me lol. I get too neurotic and worried when it comes to my "serious" art side and one college acquaintance who was in the cubicle next to mine commented(i cant remember the exact words) on how I seemed to be pulled in two different directions and that it's evident in my work, when he said it i realized he was totally right and I was really surprised by it because, I did feel that way because, on a personal level I am basically two things being mashed together and pulled apart at the same time... but noone else seemed to get that. My senior art class was very small, and most of them were tight-knit, but i felt excluded a lot of the times (dunno if it was cuz i was a little older, or because i was working 3 part time jobs and didn't really have a chance to socialize, one person i though i was friendly with ended up distancing from me, dunno why though) even though there were a couple who were friendly, but i felt scrutinized for either lack of understanding of what i was wanting to do (i mean i can't help what they got out of my work and the prof wasn't helpful neither don't know what his intention was but it didn't work lol) or for whatever reason, and it made me seize up. While i was self loathing, a professor of mine once told me, (and im paraphrasing) that art doesn't necessarily revolve around technical talent, so long as your voice comes through in it, (which admittedly sounds easy enough, but for me is really hard to do being shy and self critical)...

Anyhoo, that's the first time i have even written or talked about that really, whew feels good, anyhow, this past year, i was employed as an ESL teacher who taught art and science at a kindergarten here in Korea and it was fun for the most part, managerial politics aside, i loved working with the kids and anyone who knows kids know that kids can be brutally honest, but they were really encouraging. I loved them and they loved me. Sure they can be trying at times haha but still who can stay mad at them? It was great to be able to share things that I knew about art with them and seeing them apply it to the best of their abilities even if they were only 4-6 years old hehehe. Let me tell you some of these kids are awesome artists already! I could see them getting inspired and being creative which, trust me, can be lacking here in the land of conformity. It was good for the soul! It was great to get the kids to go with it, if they made a mistake, i had them work with it and always told them it doesn't have to be perfect, it just has to be theirs. It got me into doodling and drawing again, maybe not serious art but it made art fun again, which was the whole reason i didn't want to do art as a major ( i was afraid i'd end up hating it) and even though i did pick art as a major in the end, it was just a stepping stone to where i wanted to go anyway so what did i get so all worked up for lol, I hadn't intended to get an MFA and still don't...Fundamentals are important to learn, but ive seen some great self taught artists as well, whose art might not be perfect, but awesome to experience.


Now that i've written a novel lol...basically, Art should be fun...or at least something you love to do and want to share, no matter if others don't appreciate it. If you do, then it's good enough. I know a lot of folks would probably tell me, "Duh!" but hey, we all have our own processes and junk to sift through. even if someone tells you, you don't get it til ya get it. And others won't agree at all but that's ok, I can live with it.